How To Teach Children To Wait?
Teaching children to wait is very important, as they learn to develop the coping mechanisms necessary for everyday life. Waiting in the child involves observation, concentration and learning.
Likewise, patience is an extremely important value for the human being but it is not an innate ability . Children must learn it gradually from their first years of life, although it is not an easy task, since like us, the little ones live in a society where everything goes fast and in which everything progresses exponentially.
On the other hand, from the birth of the baby, parents strive to meet all the needs of their children, at all times and as quickly as possible. But as the little ones get older, they must learn that certain things cannot be acquired right away and that sometimes patience is needed.
Before trying some tips for teaching children to wait, it is a good idea to better understand how waiting mechanisms work and the emotions that result.
How do children cope with waiting according to their age?
During the first twelve months, the baby cannot control his emotions and clearly express his needs. When he cries, he expresses a discomfort, an unmet need such as hunger, pain or fatigue.
For the baby, waiting causes panic, fear and vulnerability. This experience can be traumatic if it is prolonged, so it is important to try to respond quickly to the need.
From twelve months to three years of life, the child has a little more control over his emotions, but has difficulties to put himself in the place of the other because he still does not have the notion of time. Therefore, depending on the circumstances, the wait may seem very long or very short.
Until he is old enough to be more receptive to the notion of time, it is best to give him concrete time and space reference points for him to understand. For example, say “after nap,” “when dad comes home from work,” or “when you finish your meal.”
These terms will be more evocative for him. In this phase, it is advisable to make the child wait one to two minutes before fulfilling his wishes.
From the age of four , the child begins to understand the concept of patience quite well and can tolerate waiting before satisfying his needs. At this age, he is also autonomous and can take care of himself. If your order is not urgent, you can wait.
“He who can be patient can have whatever he wants”
-Benjamin Franklin-
Tips for teaching children to wait
Now that we have understood the functioning of the mechanisms and the resulting emotions, here are 4 tips on how to teach children to wait:
1.- Explain
You should calmly explain to your child why he can’t get what he asks for right away. The little one will be able to understand why he has to wait and for how long.
For example, if he absolutely wants a toy, explain that he will have to look forward to a special occasion: his birthday, a family celebration, or Christmas. By imposing a delay on your child, you allow him to understand that there is a shift between his personal desires and the outside world.
2.- Value and reward
Remember to always encourage your child when he shows patience and shows him your sense of pride. Always compliment him on his good behavior, giving him some rewards or privileges to crown his efforts to wait.
3.- Give a visual signal
Specific timelines also help your child wait. For example, put small stickers in the shape of animals or fruits on the clock. You can ask him to wait until the needle is placed on the horse or the apple, for example.
When your child begins to learn to read the hours, buy him a watch so that he appreciates the notion of time and becomes a reference.
4.- Organize
If you know that your child will have a moment of waiting during the day (doctor’s appointment, excursion, restaurant, etc.) plan small games that arouse his interest. Don’t forget his stuffed animal, his favorite book, pencils or a simple snack to entertain him.
In short, if you do not know how to teach children to wait, applying the 4 previous tips will help you to have tools that improve the patience of children in order for them to learn to master the art of knowing how to wait.
